Some One Liners

If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.
You're never too old to learn something stupid.
War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.
We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.
Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
Knowledge is, knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
One careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.

Wisdom with Fun

1. Advertising is legalized lying.
2. All warfare is based on deception.
3. A weekend wasted isn’t a wasted weekend.
4. A professor is one who talks in someone else’s sleep.
5. A single death is a tragedy. A million deaths is a statistic.
6. Adding manpower to a late software project makes it later.
7. A person who never made a mistake never tried anything new.
8. A politician divides mankind into two classes: Tools and enemies.
9. Anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.
10. A university is what a college becomes when the faculty loses interest in students
11. Admitting nothing, denying everything and making counter-accusations makes you politician.

Thought Provoking Oneliners

1. Attitude determines your altitude.
2. If it can go wrong it probably already has.
3. Assumption is the mother of all screw-ups.
4. Any fool can know. The point is to understand.
5. Don’t let yesterday take up too much of today.
6. All work and no play, will make you a manager.
7. Enjoy when you can, and endure when you must.
8. As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live.
9. Be careful of your thoughts, they may become words at any moment.
10. Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.
11. Both optimists and pessimists contribute to society. The optimist invents the airplane, the pessimist invents the parachute.

One Liners

1. A beautiful relationship does not depend upon how good we understand someone but on how well we avoid misunderstandings.
2. A city is a large community where people are lonesome together.
3. A conclusion is simply the place where you got tired of thinking.
4. A conservative is a man who sits and thinks. Mostly sits.
5. A creative man is motivated by the desire to achieve, not by the desire to beat others.
6. A cynic is a man who knows the price of everything, but the value of nothing.
7. A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman’s birthday but never remembers her age.
8. A drunk mans’ words are a sober mans’ thoughts.
9. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.
10. A friend is someone who gives you total freedom to be yourself.
11. A generation which ignores history has no past – and no future.