Humours Quotes IV

1. Going to Masque doesn't make you a Muslim any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
2. We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.
3. Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.
4. The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still at the bottom of the list.
5. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
6. If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.
7. We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.
8. War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
9. Knowledge is, knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
10. Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.
11. The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

Friendship Quotes

1. A true friend knows your weaknesses but shows you your strengths; feels your fears but fortifies your faith; sees your anxieties but frees your spirit; recognizes your disabilities but emphasizes your possibilities.
2. A friendship that can end never really began.
3. Thy friendship oft has made my heart to ache: do be my enemy for friendship's sake.
4. Tell me what company thou keepst, and I'll tell thee what thou art.
5. Have no friends not equal to yourself.
6. Fate chooses your relations, you choose your friends.
7. A Friend may well be reckoned the masterpiece of Nature.
8. Keep your friendships in repair.
9. A friend is a person with whom I may be sincere. Before him I may think aloud.
10. The only reward of virtue is virtue; the only way to have a friend is to be one.
11. It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them.
 

 

Humorous Quotes III

Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive. ― Elbert Hubbard

A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal. ― Oscar Wilde, The Critic as Artist

When in doubt, ignore and be horribly unimpressed. ― Laurell K. Hamilton

No intelligent idea can gain general acceptance unless some stupidity is mixed in with it. ― Fernando Pessoa

Crying is for plain women. Pretty women go shopping. ― Oscar Wilde

If you're too open-minded; your brains will fall out. ― Lawrence Ferlinghetti

I'd rather be a rising ape than a falling angel. ― Terry Pratchett

I don't hate people. I just feel better when they aren't around. ― Charles Bukowski

When I was your age, television was called books. ― William Goldman, The Princess Bride

Illegal aliens have always been a problem in the United States. Ask any Indian. ― Robert Orben

I came from a real tough neighborhood. Once a guy pulled a knife on me. I knew he wasn't a professional, the knife had butter on it. ― Rodney Dangerfield

Honesty Quotes II

1. With death comes honesty.
2. No legacy is so rich as honesty.
3. Honesty's praised, then left to freeze.
4. Honesty is as rare as a man without self-pity.
5. Honesty is the first chapter in the book of wisdom.
6. Honesty needs no disguise nor ornament; be plain.
7. The man who pauses in his honesty wants little of a villain.
8. Lies get people into trouble, but honesty is its own defense.
9. The more honesty a man has, the less he affects the air of a saint.
10. To be honest as this world goes is to be one man picked out of ten thousand.
11. People who are brutally honest get more satisfaction out of the brutality than out of the honesty.